Make a list!
“Make a list!” The phrase reverberated throughout my childhood to address everything from packing for school to deciding on a car to buy, so naturally it echoed through my kids’ childhood, too. First from my dad, then enthusiastically adopted by my mom, and then from me, the dogma landed squarely in Annie’s consciousness so deeply it was practically one of her own rules to live by. A list of rules, if you will.
After we created this nonprofit and chose the title Annie was using for her memoir, we came across a children’s book called Pocket Full of Rocks. Of course, Annie never knew about it because it was published after she died, but when I looked up the author, she had several other books. One of them was titled, “Annie’s Life in Lists.” Incredible! I felt affirmed that we were on the right track in creating this legacy for her.
Annie made lists for everything. One thing I always thought was so funny was that she would make out the menu for the week’s dinners and then make her shopping list from that. Which is what my mom used to do. Not me—I was a dinner/grocery pantser. Annie did not learn economical and organized meal planning from me. Her lists filled journals and notebooks and Google docs. They detailed her preparations for treatment and surgery, getting Luca ready for school and even a playlist for her celebration of life.
I’m using these lists, and her journals and notebooks, to fill in the gaps in the memoir she started. They go back to junior high and, while they’re not easy to read, I am absorbing every word. She was such a strong writer and she had only just begun getting some recognition for that. I think it convinced her that she could take on a project like a memoir and she worked on it for as long as she could. I began my work on it this summer after months of putting it off. I’m not sure if I can describe what it’s like—it’s so hard to do, but work I want to take on and be fully present for. Even though I cry through most of my reading and writing it.
So, as not to leave you on such a downer note, I will instead share this: Annie’s Happiness Touchstones list. I used this list to plan her celebration of life last year and I shared it with the gathered family and friends. And now I’m going to share it with you. If you find something on the list that makes you happy, by all means borrow it and start your own list. Nothing would make Annie happier than knowing she inspired someone to start a list!
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Pocket Full of Rocks
PO Box 186
Watertown, CT 06795
PS: No, I have NOT updated the website because I’m a slacker and every time I think, “Oh, I’ll work on the website!” I get distracted and go find another task to do. Because it’s daunting! If you have any helpful suggestions other than hire a super expensive computer geek to do it, please let me know!
I wish I had room to shoehorn another rule into Rule of Three, because, “make a list” is a good one.
By the way, my heart will be with you at the book launch! I so wish I could come but I’m tied up this weekend. Can’t wait to hear about it!